Now that the shopping galore for baby things is over and you have prepared your hospital bags, you might ask, what else do you need to do before your baby arrives? Actually, a lot needs to be done to make the baby’s arrival as smooth as possible. Here are some suggestions.

1. Decide your birthing option. By this time you should have an idea on how you want to deliver your baby. If not, educate yourself on the pros and cons of the various birthing options by reading books and magazines, searching from the internet and talking to experienced mothers. You might also want to consider watching videos of child deliveries employing the various options.
   
   There are lots of birthing options to choose from. You can have it the natural way without any drugs (Lamaze, Bradley, Birthworks, etc.), natural with anesthetic pain management, or C-section. If you have made the decision, then preparations toward that option should be made, like enrollment and attendance to birthing classes when applicable. Discuss this fully with your obstetrician-gynecologist (OB).
   

2. Tour the birthing site. Go to where you want to deliver your baby and have a nice tour to familiarize yourself with the place and with the procedure. Inquire on the process/requirements for hospital admission. In some hospitals, you will not be allowed to see the inside of the delivery room but at least you would know where the rooms and other facilities are. Find out if the hospital is Mother-Baby friendly that would allow rooming-in and would support breastfeeding if those are your preferences.

3. Prepare yourself physically and emotionally. At this point, your OB might advise you to increase intake of foods rich in iron and prescribe iron supplement if she has not done before. Towards the end of pregnancy, it is advisable for you to have lots of restful sleep but remain active during most parts of the day. Regular prenatal exercise is preferable as discussed in blissful pregnancy tip #5. Active mom’s usually have relatively easier and uncomplicated natural deliveries.

Enhance emotional connection between you and your baby. Caress your tummy and talk to your baby. In all my pregnancies, I usually talk to my baby about childbirth few weeks from my due date, asking for his/her cooperation and giving my assurance that anytime he/she is ready, I am, for childbirth should be a team effort and the two of us are part of the team. I also tell how excited I am to see him/her and that I will continue to provide for his/her needs even outside my womb.

While you are still waiting for the big day, try envisioning the thrill of having your child on you hands, looking at his/her tiny lips that greet you with a smile. The joy will be far greater than the fears and anxiety of childbirth and will make you endure all discomforts. While I was on the delivery table, my focal point was the wall clock, I was keeping track of my contractions, and around it was a bare wall which I filled with nice pictures of me, my husband and my baby, together as a happy family. These were the visions that I've been keeping in my mind and heart since early in my pregnancy.

4. Arrange Domestic Matters. If you have other children, start thinking about sibling care. Arrange for who’s going to be there for them, who will be in-charge of food preparation and other domestic concerns while you are in the hospital. You might want to stock up on easy-to-prepare food in your freezer. If you are a working mom and needs to go back to work after your maternity leave, then now is the time to arrange for child care. Make sure the area where you are going to receive the baby in the house is clean and tidy.

5. Start a hobby. Despite the many things you need to do to prepare for childbirth, you might still find yourself spending time on futile musings about labor pain and blood, and even death from complications. These are normal and to a certain extent reasonable thoughts, but instead of feeding your worries, why not start a hobby that will keep your mind away from all those fears. Try embroidery on your baby clothes, or crochet a pair of booties or cross stitch a symbol of happiness. Regardless of your choice, or you might choose not to do it at all, remember that your baby is worth much much more than the entire wait.
   

6. Select your Baby's Name. This is a fun part that could also alleviate the discomforts and impatience while waiting for the big day. My husband and I had many enjoyable discussions while trying to come up with our baby's name. These are the moments when we share and (re)define our hopes and dreams for our baby and the family. Each of the names of our children were picked for a reason and has special meaning to us. Baby naming sites like this one was useful to us when we were deciding.
7. Plan the Announcement. After the long wait is the big day of your baby’s arrival. It is yours and your husband’s duty to announce the arrival of your bundle of joy so that he/she can be properly welcomed by your family and friends who are one with you in anticipating the newest addition to your family. Decide on the list of people whom you want to send the announcement to. Examples of announcement ideas include a simple text message with the child’s photo, a card bearing your child’s foot prints, a mass offering, an envelope with tobacco stick for a baby boy and a chocolate bar for a baby girl, a photo or video of you child posted on the home page of your social network account and many more. You can also be creative like this overzealous father.

During your blissful last two trimesters of pregnancy, you would be thinking of what your baby needs in its first months after birth. Completing these needs is an exciting part of childbirth preparations. It is a logical goal to accomplish this task before you reach your 7th month of pregnancy. Though shopping for baby things is definitely fun…fun…fun, this activity is also tiring and so you should not wait until the end of pregnancy as you would need a lot of rest by then.

Knowing the gender of your baby ahead is a real advantage that would help you on deciding for colors and motif when you shop (normally shades of blue for boys, and pink for girls). But if you prefer to leave it as a surprise until the baby is born or when the baby’s position does not allow for clear determination of the baby’s gender, go for neutral colors (i.e. generally white or green).

Baby showers should preferably be done earlier for you to consider the gifts received when you make your shopping list. Also consider hand-me-downs from older siblings and cousins. It is also advisable not to have too many clothes of the same size for the baby will surely grow fast and it will be a waste if clothes will only be worn once or never at all.

The following is a sample checklist of basic items that your baby would need after birth with suggested quantities in parentheses. This is basically the list I used to prepare for my four children. I took into consideration that cloth diapers were to be used during the day whenever the baby is at home for its first two months. You can revise this list depending on your preference but having a checklist to refer to is indeed valuable.

Beddings

• Baby Cot (1)
• Cot Mattress (1)
• Cot Sheets (2)
• Waterproof sheet (1)

Baby’s Layette

• Vest, Size M (3) & Size L (3)
• Wash Cloth (6)
• Mittens (6)
• Booties/Socks (6)
• Bonnet (3)
• Long Pants (3)
• Panty (3)
• Cloth Diaper (24)
• Disposable Diaper (24)
• Receiving Blanket (2)

Baby Toiletries and Others

• Bath Tub or Large Basin (1)
• Bath Towel (2)
• Petroleum Jelly (1)
• Diaper Clip/Safety Pins (2)
• Ethyl Alcohol, 70% (1)
• Baby Lotion (1)
• Baby Bath or Liquid Soap (Lactacyd Blue/J&J Top to Toe Wash) (1)
• Cotton Balls (1)
• Baby Oil and Baby Powder (not advisable for babies with allergies or asthmatic family line)

If you intend to fully breastfeed your baby, the following are not immediate requirements unless you need to pump and store your breast milk:

• Feeding Bottles
• Bottle Brush
• Breast Pump
• Bottle Sterilizer

You definitely would need a baby bag so please add that to your list. I choose a medium size bag with enough compartments so it is easy to carry and organize things that the baby would need when going out of the house. It should also be durable to last at least a couple of years or until both you and the baby outgrow the need.

All cloth should be made of pure cotton or cotton-mix especially in humid areas. Wash baby clothes with mild detergent without chlorine. Do not let your baby wear clothes directly from the department store. Enjoy your shopping but control the urge to buy things you and your baby don’t really need. As your baby grows, you can continuously add to his/her wardrobe plus accessories of course. You don’t have to purchase everything all at once. Prepare ahead and take it slow. Shop but don’t drop.

Now we progress from Parenting Tips for a Blissful Pregnancy in the First Trimester to the last two trimesters of pregnancy.

At this point, you definitely look pregnant. Making yourself comfortable will ease your thoughts away from the burdens of your heavy load and will help you focus on the wonders of pregnancy. Here are some tips.

1. Have more pillows. If you can’t buy a body pillow, having several soft pillows within your reach will be very helpful. There will come a point when pillows will be your best friend in bed, in the couch or even in the car while traveling. Use them to support your back while sitting or to rest your tummy while lying on your side.

2. Change your wardrobe. Insisting on wearing your old clothes will make you uncomfortable and look terrible. Boost your confidence by getting a few sets of maternity clothes. Choose wisely, base your choice on fit, style, design and fabric. Maternity clothes should be fashionable yet comfortable. Cotton clothing will answer concerns about perspiration.

Also, having some nice clothes to wear will inspire you to move about and regain your loosing self-esteem. Even your underwears need to be changed, at least one cup size bigger for your bra is expected. For your panties, wear something like a bikini style, which you can wear below your tummy or a large stretchable maternity type which you can pull over it.

3. Spend More to Worry Less. If you feel too tired to cook, have your food delivered. Don’t do the laundry if you can afford not to. Have it done by others. If you are blessed with reliable help to do these chores, good for you. The message is to spend more if you have to, such that you worry less on things that should be least in your concerns these days.

4. Adopt Good Posture and Wear Comfy Shoes. Adopting a good posture is important especially during pregnancy. This will reduce the risk of back injuries, minimize backaches, and provide more room for you growing baby as well.

a. When standing up, keep your shoulders back and drop them slightly, keep your back straight and lift your chest and ribs up. Tighten your stomach muscles and tuck your bottom in.

b. For a comfortable sit, find a chair that will support your back. You can also use a pillow for additional support.

c. When picking up objects, squat down, use your leg muscles and keep your back straight.

d. Roll onto your side before getting up from bed. Use your arms to help pull yourself up.

e. Avoid prolonged standing and sitting, and lifting heavy objects.

f. Wear comfy shoes or low-heeled sandals. Wearing high-heeled shoes when pregnant will put more strain on your leg muscles and back.

5. Exercise Regularly. For uncomplicated pregnancies, regular prenatal exercise offers a number of advantages. It promotes good posture; tones and strengthens muscles, particularly in the back, abdomen and pelvis; and improves blood circulation and psychological well-being of pregnant women. Exercise also induces the release of serotonin, a hormone responsible for eliciting the happy feeling.

There are varieties of antenatal exercises, but even a slow 15-minute walk in the park or your neighborhood will do. An early morning or before sunset walk to avoid the scorching heat of the sun is preferable. Avoid walking on congested and polluted streets.

6. Get the Right Nutrition. Eat a well balanced diet and take vitamins and mineral supplements. But remember to eat small frequent meals to prevent heartburn and indigestion. When you are well-nourished, pregnant or not, you feel and look vibrant. As a pregnant mom, know what you need and get it.

Folate and iron are very important supplements for pregnant women for the development of healthy red blood cells and for optimum brain development of babies. Food rich in folate are red meat, green leafy vegetables and broccoli. If you do not get enough folate and iron, you may look pale and will easily feel fatigued and breathless.

Calcium requirements can be answered by drinking lots of milk and consuming milk products. But for those who cannot tolerate high milk intake, calcium supplement may be necessary. Deficiency in calcium may cause cramps in thigh and calf muscles.

7. Indulge on a Prenatal Massage. If you wish to have a prenatal massage, have it done by a professional or somebody knowledgeable on the restrictions of this practice. Enjoy this feel good indulgence…you deserve it. For all my pregnancies, in my 3^rd trimester, it has become a nightly ritual for my husband to rub my legs with liniment for a sure good night sleep.

8. Alleviate Constipation and Prevent Hemorrhoids. It’s not uncommon for pregnant women to get hemorrhoids mainly because the growing uterus puts additional pressure on the veins around the rectum, making them swell. I know you don’t even want to think about it. Unfortunately it can happen, so I have to discuss ways of preventing it. If symptoms persist, consult your doctor.

a. Eat plenty of high fiber foods like oats, fruits and vegetables.

b. Drink plenty of water. This will also help replenish lost fluids during excessive perspiration as a consequence of hormonal changes and increased blood flow to the skin.

c. Don’t sit or stand for long periods of time.

d. If you are not ready to move your bowel, then don’t force it. Having high fiber intake and lots of water will do the trick and prevent you from becoming miserable…take your time and relax.

Basically, you only need to know the expected discomforts of pregnancy and find ways of alleviating them if you cannot totally prevent them from occurring. Bear in mind that in pregnancy, whatever you are going through is not your child’s or your husband’s fault, but yours to take willingly and cheerfully for you are sooo blessed. Again, my Congratulations! Have a Blissful Pregnancy!

Congratulations! You just found out you are pregnant. To new parents, welcome aboard…your journey starts now!!! You are having a baby and you are bound to encounter enormous challenges in your physical, physiological and psychological states. Despite these challenges, your pregnancy should be blissful. So here are simple tips to make the challenges a little less difficult. These are based on research findings and my own experiences.

1. Be Prepared. Being pregnant, especially for first-time moms, can be so frightening. What you can do is to prepare yourself by getting as much information as you can. Knowing what to expect makes the angst more manageable. Read, talk to other moms, consult professionals, etc.

2. Deal with Morning Sickness Like a Pro. Not all mothers experience morning sickness and not all pregnancies are the same. But if you are ‘lucky’ to have this concern, the following may be useful. If none of these works, or when vomiting becomes excessive (like more than 6 times a day), consult your doctor. You could be suffering from hyperemesis gravidarum.

a. Find out what triggers your morning sickness and avoid it.

b. Try chewing a gum, eating lollipop or candy or putting a small piece of ice on your tongue to see which strategy works best for you in controlling nausea.

c. Eat small frequent meals and avoid getting hungry.

d. Have some crackers or toast before getting up from bed if sickness usually happens in the morning.

e. Drink lots of fluid to rehydrate yourself.

3. Understand Cravings and Aversions. Don’t be surprised if you have strong likes and dislikes for certain food. It could be hormonal in nature. As long as you stay rational, avoid the food that spoil your mood and eat the food you like but do everything in moderation. These are the days when you should be in your best of health and not get sick to avoid medical interventions that may affect your developing baby. Remember to continue eating a variety of nutritious food.

4. Continue to be Active. For uncomplicated pregnancies, you can continue your active lifestyle. Remember that you are pregnant and not sick, but please do not overexert. Do the things that make you happy but avoid strenuous activities that will endanger the life of your baby, like rock climbing and bungee jumping.

5. Be Positive. A pregnant woman is also called expectant. A positive pregnant woman expects good things to happen. In fact something wonderful is already happening to you and your family even while you are still pregnant. So in the face of hardships, tell this to yourself - “This too shall pass.” And it will.

For the next stage, proceed to Parenting Tips for a Blissful Pregnancy: 2nd and 3rd trimesters.

It’s been two years since I gave up my job to become a full time mother and wife. The decision did not come quick and easy though my tummy was heavy with our third child at that time. Although the child was a welcome addition to our family, the job I had was an ideal one, I thought, and therefore hard to give up.

I was Manager and Head of a Research and Development Department, which I myself built. I had the liberty to experiment on all sorts of ideas to solve pest problems, come up with recommendations and see for myself the impact of such when implemented. I was making breakthroughs in real field and business situations. But what was inside my womb was also for real.

The first trimester was extremely challenging because I experienced excessive vomiting called hyperemesis gravidarum. I endured the three weeks ordeal and immediately went back to work after I felt a little better. Episodes of premature labor set in during my second trimester. The daily drive of 2 to 5 hours, field work and the high stress level were not compatible with my physical condition, which was aggravated by frequent breathing difficulty and blue lips. This was later diagnosed as mitral valve prolapse (MVP), a congenital heart disorder that I didn’t know was there until my body can no longer hide it. Doctor’s advice was “take it slow and rest from work” while my husband’s pleading was “leave work and concentrate on taking care of us.”

After weeks of contemplation, a phone conversation with my mentor ended the struggle. This is what she said, “You are sacrificing your career for you family and I believe that it will be all worth it in the end. Sacrifice means giving up something good for something better, so it’s not sacrifice after all.” It’s like saying that the loss will never outweigh the gain. With those words, I got my much needed affirmation and made my decision. Despite the insistence of my former boss for me to continue working with special arrangements so I can fulfill work and family duties at the same time, I had come to the conclusion that having both worlds at this stage of my life is only a wishful thinking.

Few months after I gave birth, my husband and I ventured into business, hoping to address our financial obligations and have more time with the children, eventually. Apparently, since the business is just starting, it took much of our time and energy with very little left for the family. The challenge did not end there though. We have just opened our second outlet when I learned I was pregnant again and history repeated itself. I was again asked by my husband to stop what I was doing for the baby’s sake. Though vomiting was never an issue in this pregnancy, minor bleeding during the first trimester, premature labor and signs of MVP during the second and third trimesters were major concerns. I gave in to my husband’s insistence to close down the business for there was nobody else to take over my business task. This time the decision came quicker and easier.

All these events had taken a great toll on our finances but we remained consistent with our commitment to raise happy, healthy and well-rounded children that will make a difference in society when they grow up. We tried to cut our expenses to live within our means but the children’s health and education is non-negotiable. The first batch of our children who are now school-age stayed in a pure Montessori school, which command higher fees than any other private school in the area but provide a learning environment we believe in. The school provides an environment that promotes competition with one’s self and not with others; this will help them be the best that they can be. In that school, they are allowed to express themselves and be creative. I will share more about the school in another blog. They don’t get to wear nice, new shoes and clothes in school (they don’t wear uniforms) as they used to but they get the kind of education we want for them. Anyway, they look good in their old, undersized shirts, skirt and pants; well, shall we say, it helped that they are naturally good-looking.

Breastfeeding has been my advocacy. My children were all fully breastfed for at least six months from birth and mixed-fed for the next month or two, and this helped a lot in reducing expenses not only on the cost of milk formula but also on medicine and other medical expenses. They don’t get sick easily because of the immunity they get from breast milk. Other cost-cutting measures we did and breastfeeding issues deserve entirely new blogs.

Months have passed and I am still jobless, the family is struggling financially. But thanks to my husband who is taking good control of this matter so I can focus on child care and other household matters. A number of opportunities came my way including an exceptional job offer. Though tempted to grab an opportunity at times, I remained fully committed to my family and the agreement I had with my husband.

My children have become ‘delightful burdens’ in my professional growth and in our pursuit for financial freedom. But I felt so delighted that I decided to stay with the 'burden' and forget about the rest, making my children a burden no more. With this arrangement, my children are just so grateful. To them, everything is simple; ‘Mama quit her job to care for us because Mama loves us’, not mindful of the consequences of this move. But who cares about the consequences? They are what matters most in my life, anyway. My husband has always been so appreciative of me and with what I do for them. Being far from an emotional, I can see his conscious effort to show me his appreciation and that made it so sweet of him.

Now, as I see my children grow before my eyes, as evidenced by their undersized clothing, the sense of dignity and pride are immeasurable. The list of positive adjectives to describe them will be very long, but here are some. They are good-looking, smart, talented, confident, God-loving, well-behaved, healthy and happy. I have been blessed with four wonderful children, a blissful marriage and a happy family. Who needs a job? Not me, at least for now when my family needs me most.