I regret having dipped the bucket of my two older kids early this morning.

The day got off on the wrong foot with issues carried over from last night. One of the issues has to do with school requirements, which was pushed over the edge when Leon can't find his school ID a few minutes before the school shuttle service arrived.

After some leading questions from Mama Sez, Leon eventually remembered that he must have left it in the boy's comfort room in school yesterday when he changed his shirt. I was hard on him because of the ID and also because of what I eventually realized was just a misunderstanding of an agreement he had with his mom - on being responsible for getting up early and getting ready for school, which he thought was in effect only for a day, and that was yesterday.

Rica, his older sister, also got her share of my displeasure, which was undeserved. All I wanted to do was to ask her to assist her brother on his requirement and in looking for his ID in school. I could have done it in a better way: without the angry and demanding tone, but in a respectful, empowering manner deserving of respect and cooperation from a person being requested.  It was unfair and mean of me to scold her for responsibilities that wasn't hers in the first place and an expectation she wasn't fully aware of.

After some time to reflect on what just happened, I realized the impact my bucket dipping might have on my kids' mindset today.  I cannot wait for them to get home to apologize and try to straighten things out.  They are actually wonderful, responsible kids and they deserve to know.

Note to self: Don't sweat the small stuff; do bucket filling, instead of bucket dipping.

When I woke up this morning, I realized that my school kids didn’t need to go very early. Instead of the usual 6:30am in a carpool, it was 7:30am with their Papa bringing them to school. That meant an additional hour for me. What did I do with it? I spent extra 30 minutes in bed waiting for our baby to crawl towards me (the first thing she does is look for me), and for our toddler to gleefully utter his Good Morning Nadine! He greets his dear baby sister first before me. Then it’s time for the bottle challenge.

After preparing breakfast and packed lunch for the school kids, I still have a few minutes to spare before the family assemble in the dinning room for breakfast.  They were still getting dressed. I remembered my coffee moments in the west terrace of the house, so I eagerly prepare to spend quiet time in my special spot with a mug of hot choco. It’s a good chance to reflect, I thought.

As I prepare my drink, here comes my two-year-old son and then the interview began…actually it was more of an interrogation. Though he is too familiar with the choco drink even the brand in particular, he asked “What is that Mommy?”

He kept following my every move probably sensing that I’m up to something. As I picked up the mug he popped another one “Who's that for?”

On my way to the terrace, he asked again, this time it’s a series and he is starting to panic. “Where are you going Mommy? Are you going to Dapdap? (It’s the street along the west terrace.) Where are my slippers? Can I come with you?”

Gotcha! Well, I knew it from the very first question. So you might have guessed the little boy got what he wanted. Picture the mommy and her little boy sharing a mug of hot choco in the terrace, watching the villagers doing their morning walk, calling the stray cats and dogs passing by and counting the birds flying high. You will hear the constant demand for a piece of bread that needs to be dunked in the choco drink before eating. Ever heard of that eating style?

I thought it was a good chance to reflect...and it remained so true even with my little boy beside me. It was not quiet, though. But then, it was a lot better than what I planned.

This morning’s reflection showed me how lucky I am to still have little children wanting to tag along like ducklings following mother duck. My little angels needed care like hatchlings in the nest waiting for mother bird to feed them. Good for my son, it was bread and not worms, lol.

Before I know it my little kids will all be grown ups, longing for a life on their own. Moments like this are indeed treasures to enjoy now and cherish forever.